The security services of the Russian Federation were out in full force in SWAT regalia to put down a mortal threat to the state: hundreds of topless Russian hookers in spike heels poured into the streets in front of the Kremlin to protest the WIKI-leaked news that Donald Trump wiretapped hotel rooms throughout the city to catch Vladimir Putin or Dmitri Medvedev, or the two of them together, in an act of Water Games.
Getting a heads-up on the news, a Hollywood producer well-connected to the Kremlin filed a FOIA request and a trademark infringement lawsuit against the president and the CIA for using the words "Water Games," "Yellow River," "Hookers," and "Russia," in a Top Secret dossier no one, not even the CIA nor the former KGB-agent president of the United States, have seen. The only ones who have seen it were John McCain and the former Brit agent McCain, working to get Hillary Clinton elected, hired to dig dirt up on the president.
As news of the lawsuit and FOIA requests were leaked to the press by executives at Uranium-1, a global concern headed by its secret CEO, known only by the initials HRC, reporters at MSNBC peered through the president's tax returns from 2005. They were looking for clues for payments to Russian hookers with quaint names such as Water Babushka and P Mee A Showerski.
From leaks, to leaking, to leaking about leaks, New York Times editors Paul Krugman and Tom Friedman consulted with Fareed Zakaria of the Washington Post and CNN, and Rachel Maddow of MSNBC, to leak more information and myths out of their nether regions - the closest place to the truth available to these people.
What to make of the taxes Donald Trump paid... and Barack Obama and Warren Buffett did not? It now appears that Warren, an Obama associate, and the former president, a Karl Marx associate, paid less taxes in dollar amount and percentages than the current president.
As reporters caught up to Sen. Bernie Sanders running up the stairs to congress, the senator refused to be engaged and uttered "No Comment!" The revelation that Donald Trump actually paid taxes exploded heads across the US media and made Rachel Maddow's premature half hour rant all the more premature.
Embarrassing that is, for MSNBC, Buffett, Obama, Maddow, Tom Friedman, Paul Krugman, Jeff Bezos of Amazon and the Washington Post, Fareed at CNN, and the New York Times, organizations having had demanded for over a year trying to get their hands on these returns.
They were certain to prove to the world that former woman abuser, steak magnate and Soviet undercover operative-and-saboteur Donald Trump didn't pay his taxes - ever. His motive for non-payment was to bankrupt these United States, and was therefore was a national security risk and unfit for the presidency.
Hearing about his tax returns being illegally leaked without his permission, and having paid almost $40 million in taxes on a $150 million income, far in excess of his critics, the president reminded Barry and Warren in perfect Russian to "PAY YOUR FAIR SHARE!"
He added, pointing up at Trump Towers: YOU DIDN'T BUILD THIS!
Meanwhile, a new Russian website covering leaks, leaking and other non-stoppable flow of what The People must not hear, released their first issue titled: LEAK ME IN YELLOW, with articles headlined: Low Cost Camera-and-Potty-Free Hotel Rooms in St. Petersburgh
; Hidden Microphones in Black Caviar with Vodka, McArthur Dildos, the Current Rage for Rental Dachas; and Great Hooking Up Hangouts In the Gulag
The half-naked hookers in spike heels circling the Kremlin pushed back against the FSB SWAT teams with pink sex toys, at which time they were confronted by on-the-scene BBC and CNN reporters who showed them photos of Donald Trump.
Every one of the 300 admitted that he looked very familiar to a man who must have abused them.